Four Times Down the Same Track: An Ode to Second Chances
This is what rising from rock bottom actually looks like. . .
Disclaimers: Spoilers ahead—obviously! I saw F1: The Movie four times in theaters because it felt less like watching a movie and more like getting ready for something I can’t afford to miss. This post is a layered unpacking of cinematic impact, creative parallels, and what it means to wait for your moment. I’m not a film critic, just a deeply moved creative out here connecting the dots to make sense of this thing called life. Take what resonates, leave what doesn’t, and maybe watch the movie again and again when you’re done. Oh—and no, this isn’t sponsored. But it should be.
What The People Are Saying:
Dedicated to my Spill fam—y’all remind me that my words are worth sharing. The way you engage with my posts, reflect on my reflections, and celebrate how I turn random moments into something real is a big part of what keeps me writing. And to the woman who got in my car that Tuesday, July 8th—my only Lyft ride of the day—thank you for letting me talk your ear off about movies and second chances as we cruised across town. Some people show up exactly when you need them to, leave their mark, and disappear forever. She was one of those.
Writing Playlist: 🎬✍🏾✨
These were the sounds that kept me locked in while the words found their way.
Accurate AF because I do stand on business. And that business is watching the same movies repeatedly like it’s my moral obligation. Mind yours. 😌😘
Instagram Reel via Film House Cinemas
The Green Light Comes Eventually
This blog almost didn’t happen.
These past few weeks, life has been throwing red flags left and right—family chaos, forgetting I’m human and need rest days, computer crashes (literally the day before this piece was set to go live)...I mean way too many plot twists back to back. But just like Sonny Hayes in that pit lane—deep into the final race of the biggest championship of his life, where everything could shift in a single moment—I am staying seated and focused, waiting for my green light.
***IF YOU CAME HERE EXPECTING A SPOILER-FREE EXPERIENCE…BE SO FOR REAL. THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE TO TURN BACK BEFORE I START TALKING LIKE WE ALL WATCHED IT TOGETHER LAST NIGHT.***
Right before my favorite scene in F1: The Movie, Sonny crashes into one of the barriers. It’s dramatic, unexpected, and completely out of his control. But what adds even more weight to the moment is Sonny’s reputation because he’s previously and deliberately caused issues on the tracks. So when the board pauses the race to decide what happens next, it’s not just about the crash—it’s about whether or not they still trust him to continue on racing. Apex Grand Prix (APXGP), Sonny’s team, is under extreme scrutiny, the pressure is thick, and no one knows if he’ll be cleared to keep going until the very last few seconds before the race continues.
As the crew rebuilds his car, Sonny waits—calm, still, hoping they’ll call it fair.
And though the scene is centered around Sonny…I’m more relatable in this scenario to his teammate, Joshua Pearce (JP).
The one who’s been playing by the rules. Giving my best team effort. Doing everything just about right. Keeping pace, staying focused, and still stuck waiting—uncertain if the moment I’ve been preparing for is ever going to arrive.
This scene sticks with me, even this morning, as I’m making the final edits and proofing this post. It’s the quiet tension of holding on, staying locked in, and knowing I deserve a win…even if not knowing exactly when it will come.
I’m learning to really understand that just because the win is delayed doesn’t mean it’s denied, and just because it’s taking longer doesn’t mean it won’t be worth it.
If you thought this was just a blog about another movie? AHT…WRONG! It’s about the way my brain grabs onto one passing moment—like watching a random movie—spirals, connects it to my entire life…and suddenly I’m 3,000 words deep in a full emotional arc. At this point, it’s a gift.
Now buckle up. We’ve got laps to cover.
The Ril Talk
Breaking a cycle and building something better usually starts with one honest moment: recognizing the pattern.
By the second time I watched this movie, one thought became so damn clear: I don’t want to keep having “fleeting experiences”. To some, I know my life might look pretty average—and under my current, temporary circumstances—society would label me as poor, living below the poverty line as a single individual. But Sonny's outlook on his predicament is what makes me feel even more grateful for my personal situation.
While I know that neither good nor bad experiences exist continuously forever without some sort of intervention, I'm on a current journey of creating a life where more of my good experiences come and last far longer than the bad ones. I'm doing the inner work to not feel bad for myself. Because once I overcome this season, I know I'm becoming equipped with the knowledge and wisdom to never find myself in this exact same position again.
I am not my circumstances, and my rock bottom is not my permanent destination.
You Ever See a Movie Four Times on Purpose by Accident?
My love for moviegoing didn’t start yesterday—it’s been a solid part of my life for maybe close to a decade now. It’s not just a pastime—it's my thing, my escape, a form of therapy. I show up, I settle in, and I let the feature take me somewhere else. And thanks to my community on Spill (shoutout to y’all), I’ve become more comfortable in wanting to share more of these experiences—what makes me laugh, what pulls something out of me, what annoys me, and what I find myself still trying to unpack days, even weeks later.
Now, I’m not the type to love every film or show I watch. But I also don’t believe in tearing down someone’s creative work just because it didn’t do anything for me. That’s not my ministry. I can like or love something without needing it to be perfect. I can appreciate the message, even when the execution isn’t flawless.
Take F1: The Movie, for example. To a real racing fan, maybe it was absolutely too unrealistic and trash. I wouldn’t know—I just know I love fast cars and a good story told with intention. I wasn’t in the theater analyzing mechanics or lap strategies. I freaking love good momentum, high stakes, and a plot that makes you lean in. This one movie had exactly that.
The visuals and camera angles were stunning. Depending on the theater and format I chose, the sound quality was so crisp that one minute I felt like I was in the stands, ready to scream with the crowd, and the next I was seeing through Sonny or JP’s visor—feeling the speed, the grip, and the pressure of every turn and corner like I was driving myself. For a few seconds at a time, it felt like I was the one making the split-second calls. Where a car buff might spot every flaw, I was locked in and let the story it speak to me. I took notes like I was writing a dissertation.
And then there’s the sound—the combination of score and soundtrack that is just chef’s kiss.
Hans Zimmer’s contributions in this film are less about dominating the moment and more about knowing when to guide it. His compositions glide underneath the scenes with intention—highlighting stillness, punctuating tension, and letting emotion rise right on cue. You don’t even realize you’re being pulled in by the sound until it’s already happening.
Like in my absolute favorite scene—Sonny’s final lap to the finish line—where he’s ‘flying’ down the track, the audio shifts into this full-body chill territory. I intentionally treated myself to a fourth watch just to experience that moment one more time on the big screen. From the very first time I saw it, I knew that this movie would become one of my comfort films. Each time, it had me fully levitating in my seat—literal goosebumps.
It’s giving Flight from Man of Steel all over again—another Zimmer masterpiece that lives rent-free in my mind, but for some reason still isn’t available to stream or download in its full glory. And just like that scene, the specific audio during Sonny’s final lap only exists inside the film itself. You won’t find it on the official score, no matter how hard you dig. Trust me, I’ve tried!
(For reference, the audio from the F1: The Movie scene starts around 1:17 in this clip. And if it mysteriously disappears, just know…pirating is bad, kids! 😅)
And of course, here’s the link for Flight from Man of Steel to tickle your fancy.
Lastly, what makes the overall soundscape even more satisfying is that Hans didn’t carry it alone. The soundtrack itself features a lineup of artists whose songs sit perfectly alongside the score. It’s the kind of project where you leave the theater wanting to Shazam everything—where the music doesn’t just support the story, it rounds it out, and adds great texture.
And yes—you better believe that I will be buying it when this bad boy streams.
Instagram Post via Film House Cinemas
Okay But What Is Formula One?
Formula One (F1) is the highest class of international auto racing for single-seater cars—aka those sleek, open-wheel race cars you see speeding through tracks at up to 220+ mph. It’s fast, technical, and wildly strategic.
Each F1 team has two drivers who race for the same team, but here’s the twist:
They’re not just teammates—they’re also competing against each other. While both drivers are trying to help the team win points in the overall championship, they’re still battling for their own position, reputation, and contracts.
So yes, they share a garage, but once they’re on that track……it’s every driver for themselves.
To complete the team, there is a full squad of engineers, strategists, technicians, and a pit crew—all working the data, changing the tires, rebuilding the cars after damages, and making the behind-the-scenes decisions that can make or break a race. Everyone on the team absolutely matters!
Image Credit: Apple Original Films / F1: The Movie (2025) promotional still
The Authenticity Factor
These weren’t just scenes on a closed set with big green screens and fancy editing. Brad Pitt and Damson Idris had to actually learn how to drive Formula One cars, and these scenes were actually filmed during real F1 race weekends—with full crowds, full pressure, and no CGI pit stops. I get chills just thinking about it! It adds to the realism and makes you connect more and respect the art of acting, especially when done right.
During one of my deep dives scrolling through Instagram Reels, YouTube interviews, and press articles, I remember both director Joseph Kosinski and actor Brad Pitt sharing that one of the most iconic scenes—Sonny pulling out of the garage—had only a 15-minute window to be filmed. The track setup was only available on a race night, which meant no rehearsal and no second take. Brad and Damson had to lock in and drive at real speeds, with real tire grip issues, in front of a live Formula One audience.
I absolutely love when actors have to be placed in scenes with the experts, who do these things every day for a living.
The Beauty of Starting Over
When Sonny arrives at the APXGP track to meet Ruben following his offer, he wastes no time. After a bit of snarky banter with the team, he gets straight to business—requesting the exact setup JP had just been practicing with moments earlier. He was so confident that if he couldn’t beat JP’s time by even a second, he’d see himself out. But the beauty is what happened after he accidentally crashed the million dollar speedster. He didn’t sulk. He got up, calculated, and processed what had happened, and gave valuable feedback to Kate, the team’s technical director—feedback that JP couldn’t offer. Not because he wasn’t focused, but because he hadn’t learned to notice the details that really mattered yet.
And that’s what made Sonny a very important asset to the team. It wasn’t just his skills, but his awareness. Kate was in need of a driver who could communicate beyond the obvious—someone who could explain the unspoken things happening in real-time, because no amount of sensors could replace the instinct of a driver actually being inside the car.
It reminded me of how I am having to re-learn and study my craft after taking a break. I have to read the manual on me—learn this new version of my work, my process, my pace. This comeback is very personal and it’s my second chance—my upgraded vehicle—and I’m learning how to drive it.
"What Are You Doing Here, Sonny?"
It’s during this same test drive—right before the crash, right before he offers Kate the kind of insight no one else could—that Sonny asks himself a simple but loaded question: “What are you doing here?”
It’s a moment of internal doubt disguised as curiosity, because sometimes being in the room—or on the track—with people at the top of their game makes you question if you belong. Truth is, you’re there for a reason, and what matters most is how you show up and handle the moment!
This movie being shot alongside real professionals on actual race days made me feel more connected the story. It brought me right back to my first time doing bridal makeup in July 2021. I had a 4AM call time, standing shoulder-to-shoulder with seasoned artists I’d looked up to for years. I’m talking about women whose work was on my mood boards. That “What are you doing here?” was all too real, but I leaned into it, and accepted that I deserved to be there! I took a moment that seemed too good to be true, and reveled in it!
That one job lead to 36.
Your Gifts Are Bigger Than You
“Formula One is a team sport. It always was.” —Kate, APXGP Technical Director
Just like makeup!
I see and get Sonny's stubbornness, and I respect it, because I can be the same way when I know what the hell I'm doing and what's worth standing for. Some of the most powerful outcomes in the movie happen when Sonny intentionally takes hits to his car—strategically slowing down the race to create gaps that would bring out the safety car, giving JP a real shot at a qualifying position. The team called his tactics "chaos" and modes for "combat," but those moves helped them score their historic first point and take positions and leads the team had never before.
Again—Sonny made himself indispensable by thinking beyond just his own race.
It’s a strategy—and maybe even a calculated sacrifice—that speaks to seasoned artists who’ve put in the years, done the heavy lifting, and are now shifting their focus from center stage to legacy—creating space for someone else to shine.
Think about how much serious skill it takes to intentionally drive poorly when you're capable of damn near perfection, just like a phenomenal singer choosing to sing off-key for a comedic role or deliberately holding back their full range to serve the story. The best of us don't let pride and ego get in the way of allowing other artists to take the spotlight. It's not about staying stuck in the past—it's about honoring what we know while adapting to what's new. I'm not afraid to embrace the trends, the reels, the tech—but I do it with intention. Because I've built something sustainable. And fresh doesn't mean forgettable. When the people around you trust your vision, you can move with clarity. You can build something bigger than any one person.
I see this perfectly executed with the Nicki Rouge Bridal Team, led by Nicki Rouge Bijou herself—Chicago's #1 Beauty Team for diverse and glamorous weddings. Nicki's about to read this and be like "Girl, when did you write this?!" But here we are. I must give credit where credit is undeniably due. Her carefully curated team and their accomplishments always leaves my dang jaw on the floor when I’m scrolling on the gram’.
What started as one woman's mission to help other women feel more beautiful and confident has grown into one of the most sought-after bridal beauty teams in Chicago and beyond. Watching them build together—with fairness, strategy, and genuine love—has been beautiful to witness. Nicki didn't try to do it all alone. She built a squad of talented artists who share her values, and now they're serving hundreds of brides and collecting five-star reviews and accolades like trophies. Just another reminder that real growth doesn't happen overnight or alone, no does legacy.
Bravo Nicki! Bravo ladies!
Connect with the Nicki Rouge Bridal Team:
To My Younger Generation. . .
I say this from the heart: don’t confuse effort with failure. Just because it’s hard, doesn’t mean it’s not working.
And to the seasoned artists who feel like they’ve “been there, done that”—you can still learn. Always! If you drop the ego, you’ll realize how much there is to gain from the younger generation. And in return, you can teach them how to sustain. That’s the bridge we need.
Stop gatekeeping. Stop dismissing. Start building.
When JP started mirroring Sonny, it wasn’t forced. It was respect. It was influence. That’s how culture is shaped—by what we do, not just what we say. And I believe if we model professionalism and authenticity, those who get it will follow suit in their own way.
If it sounds like I’m yelling—it’s because I care. I want better for us. For the industry. For the legacy.
Plan A vs. Plan C: The Art of Pivoting
Another powerful instance in the film is when Sonny has to unexpectedly pull back into the pit with a punctured tire, not even a full lap into a race, and anticipates the new soft tires he requested. He challenges the team’s decision to stick to “Plan A” (hard tires) even after the race had clearly gone left—it was an intense moment. As he makes his way to the pit, firmly over the intercom he says, “Plan A is for when things go right. You see anything going right?”
The team—still unsure if they could fully trust him—tries to override his call and fits the car with hard tires anyway. But Sonny sits there—engine running, helmet on, completely still. He waits. There’s no yelling or extra dramatics from him, just his firm, unwavering presence. Eventually, they cave and he gets what he asked for. That wasn’t stubbornness. That was conviction.
He’s wasn’t just asking for soft tires—he was demanding trust in his judgement that it was now time for “Plan C”. In that split-second call, he proves he’s not just driving the car, he’s reading how the entire race would go from that moment forward. Instead of panicking, he pivots—with clarity, confidence, and control.
Whew! Doesn’t that make you rethink how gracefully you might have handled situations in past moments?!
Don’t let losing one tire stop you from winning the whole race. Don’t let a single disruption convince you the day is ruined.
It reminded me specifically of a conversation I had recently with someone close to me. They got home from a bad day at work—hinged entirely on one frustrating moment, which I get it. Growing up in an angry household, I used to think the same way. One person or inconvenience could ruin everything. But healing taught me otherwise. These days, I choose to pause, recenter, and ask myself: Is the whole day bad, or was that just a bad moment? I’ll turn on a playlist, clean my space, go for a walk, or take a nap. Then I get back to living the rest of my day.
There’s still time left on the clock. Pivot.
The Importance of Patience
Patience shows up again and again in this film—quiet, subtle, but powerful.
During Sonny’s first test drive, Ruben—APXGP’s team owner and Sonny’s former racing partner—watches from the monitor with quiet intensity. Just before a critical turn, Ruben calmly says, “wait”. And when he finally says “now”, it’s as if Sonny feels it before he hears it. Their was trust, the right timing, and synchronicity. It was beautiful to watch.
A similar moment plays out later, but in reverse—when Sonny tells JP to wait before taking the lead, but JP doesn’t. The need to prove something and the desire to feed his ego clouded his judgment in the rain, which ended in a horrific, fiery crash. Just like that, everything changed.
Patience is very important.
That particular moment reminded me of what happens when we try to speed through our growth. Taking the lead before we’re actually ready. Jumping lanes without a clear plan. JP’s crash in that bad weather feels a lot like going viral before your business is ready—no foundation, no systems, no directions for what’s next. Just momentum and pressure you can’t sustain.
It’s not just about having talent. It’s about knowing when to move, and also when to pause.
That’s the work I do now—as a Beauty Coach. I’m not here to make people wait forever, but I am here to help them recognize when they’re actually ready. It’s not enough to be “good.” You have to be grounded. You have to have something to return to once the noise fades.
The next generation deserves leaders who aren’t just fast—but wise.
The Final Lap: Three Laps is a Lifetime
Sonny's vision starts failing him right before the biggest race of not only his Formula One comeback, but of his life. I know that feeling—when your body betrays you at the worst possible moment. Those sharp pains shooting through my spine during shoots or long days on set, wondering if I can even finish the job. But sometimes that's exactly when miracles happen.
Remember the scene I opened this all up with in the very beginning? While the team was rebuilding Sonny's car, the F1 race announcer asks: "The question is, do they have the car?"
Ruben responded: "We have the driver."
What happens next is pure poetry. Those fresh tires they couldn't use in a prior race the day before because they didn't qualify, suddenly became they're the secret weapon with only three laps to go. The underdogs who've been scraping for every opportunity finally get their moment. While everyone else is running on worn rubber, Sonny's got grip that'll take him wherever he needs to go.
Throughout the season, you could hear the difference between veteran wisdom and rookie hope in their strategy meetings. Once, JP offered the advice, "Hope for lucky breaks”, while Sonny countered it with "Create your own breaks. Hope is not a strategy”.
JP took that lesson to heart. When you're feeling defeated, keep going—it's usually an indication that a breakthrough is coming. Eventually, as a team, JP and Sonny were working together to make sure one of them won that final race. Sonny had created those first few breaks, allowing JP to take P1 (position one). And in return, JP created the ultimate break for Sonny—intentionally falling behind, crashing into real F1 driver Lewis Hamilton. That move gave Sonny the wide-open path to win his first official Formula One race.
That's what "create your own breaks" looks like in action.
Watching Sonny fly down that track in first place—turning a fleeting moment into something legendary—gave me chills. My wins might not look like Formula One podiums, but when I power through a long shoot, wrap an eight-hour wedding, or scroll through the final images of something I have been anticipating to see, with pain still buzzing in my neck and back—that’s my checkered flag.
I made it. I’m still in the race.
Again, if this video goes missing…let’s all act confused together. 🫣
You Are What You Do Every Day
Walking out of that theater for the second time, I felt something I wasn't ready for: the uncomfortable truth that I'm not doing enough. And instead of fighting that feeling, I'm using it as fuel to push myself further.
Watching Sonny navigate every obstacle thrown his way made me want to squeeze more out of my time, my brain power, and my efforts. The way he stayed disciplined, but still found joy in what mattered—that's the life I'm building toward.
You are what you do every day! I’m anchoring myself in motion.
The only way to master something is to live it, breathe it, become it.
I'm not just working toward becoming the woman I envision—I'm being her now. Experiencing life through her eyes, making decisions from her confidence, so when I reach those higher levels, I'll have gratitude for every step that got me there.
I've been brutal with myself for years. Counted myself out when I should've been my biggest believer. Fear cost me opportunities I'll never get back, but that chapter is closed.
Fear cannot go where I'm headed!
There's something sacred about choosing to keep going—not because you're guaranteed a win, but because the road still calls your name. Sonny didn't wait for a perfect car to prove his worth. He studied what he had, learned it inside and out, made the necessary adjustments—and then drove the hell out of it. That's exactly what I've been doing with this life of mine.
This movie reminded me of the woman I've been building quietly in the background. She's intentional. She's reliable. And she doesn't chase attention—she attracts alignment. I don't want to just be good at what I do. I want to be remembered for how I made others feel while doing it.
Maybe I'll never win a race in front of millions. But I'll keep showing up for the one person who needs what I have, including myself.
You don't need more. You need to believe that what you've got is already enough to start.
Now I just need to figure out how to see a live Formula One race before I die!!!!!!!
"Don't be shitty to yourself. There are plenty of people out there who will do that for you." —Sonny
I’m proudly anti-trailer because they always spoil the best parts…but for the “I need to see a preview first” crew—here.
Don’t say I never gave you anything, lol! 🙄🤭
As always, thank you so much for taking the time to read! 🏎️
Until next time,
Your Beauty Experience Coach,
Found this helpful? Don’t keep it to yourself—share it with your beauty pro friends or your community! Let’s keep the conversation going drop a comment below or slide into my DMs—I’d love to hear your thoughts! ♥️💭✨
